All About Poop

Nobody can ever really be prepared for baby poop. People can tell you about the metamorphosis of poop, but you never really know about it until it happens.

Just like parenting in general. EVERYBODY likes to give you their two cents about what the first few days, weeks, months and years are like as a new parent, but it is something not fully understood until experienced.

Well, we have been experiencing a new facet of babyhood/toddlerdom in poop lately. Over the last two weeks, Grace has been self feeding 80% of the time. This means real food. Solid food. Adult food. Hence the transition into adult poops.

It is soooo gross.

The manifestation of cheese, cheerios, chicken, peas and beans into a diaper makes my stomach turn.

This morning Grace woke up screaming at about 2 am. I ignored it, saying she would fall back to sleep soon. Matt could not. It turned out to be a good thing he got up, because she was indeed upset about something.

Apparently another downside of big girl poops is that it is much harder to sleep though the event and wait until the morning – which has always been the case thus far.

At 11 months old, is it too early to start thinking about potty training introductions?

The Power of Stoplights

I have a job interview this morning. I am incredibly nervous. I’m not so sure why, other than I think the job would be perfect for me. If I don’t get it, life will go on. It is no more money, just more experience, and I am desperate for experience right now.

As I neared the end of my drive into work today, my stomach started doing flip flops. The self defeating thoughts started burrowing into my head. I wanted to pull over on the side of the road and breathe before I started to cry.

Then two things happened.

My ‘beep beep’ went off on my radio to inform me that Bob Marley was here to save me with “Three Little Birds.” This is always an inherently happy thing in my world.

As I got to the refrain, I turned around (we were at a stoplight) to sing to Gracie. She turned her head, reached her hand up to touch me and gave me the most beautiful smile ever. Like she knew I needed it. And I did.

So to steal from my tweet, every little thing IS going to be OK. Thanks Bob!

Thank you Grace, for giving Mama just what I needed. Your smile can fix anything.

Closing Days of Babyhood

One more month.

We have exactly 30 days until my baby is no longer a baby. I know I have blogged about this before, but I am sad. Is it possible to be excited and sad at the same time?

I can only imagine the developments that will take place in her last month of babyhood though. Gracie has grown so much. She is crawling so quickly and pulling up on everything. She is reading books with us and knows what comes next. She will eat a quarter of a chicken breast and a full adult serving of veggies at dinner!

Oh, and she is feisty too. Apparently, she screamed when she wasn’t the first to get her diaper changed at daycare yesterday. Her teacher, who is an immigrant, always says it is good that Gracie is a fighter. That in America you have to fight for everything.

Is that really true?

Well, I still have 30 more days to baby my baby. And on the 31st day, I will still baby her. I don’t care if the title changes to Toddler. She won’t HAVE to fight on my watch.

Crazy Cube Neighbor

My Crazy Cube Neighbor REALLY IS crazy. His CCN acronym didn’t come out to thin air. For those of you who haven’t been following my tweets, here are some of my CCN entries:

Crazy Cube Neighbor just left a loud & aggressive voice message with shrink about wanting to "stomp someone's face to make a point." 02:04 PM July 03, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor trying to find home phone number of old UM guidance counselor again- forget the obvious crazy- WHO DIALS 411 ANYMORE?? 12:51 PM July 07, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor very chipper this morning. Went to the Indian Pow Wow Festival on Sat. & is now talking about the circus nonstop. 08:34 AM July 14, 2008 from web

Think Crazy Cube Neighbor must have Tourettes Syndrome. Just growled, "Diaper Baby! Diaper Baby!" It was really freaky. 03:01 PM July 23, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor just growled, " I smoke crack!" with another smattering of obscenities. 11:30 AM August 07, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor is on a roll this week. Now he is growling "Stinking Irish Cod, Stinking Irish Cod!" with obscenities. So glad it's Fri. 02:07 PM August 08, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor left crazy/threatening messages on voice mail of potential employer. Today got a call saying services not needed. 02:15 PM August 12, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor is listening to creepy spa-like Native American flute music. Really Loud. It is anti-calming to me. I want to scream. 01:41 PM August 14, 2008 from web

Just heard Crazy Cube Neighbor brought in candy yesterday with a note saying something along the lines of "Bite this / suck on these" 01:37 PM September 04, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor calling antique shops to try and sell an old pocket knife and tire gauge. Pawn shop told him not worth anything. 01:58 PM September 05, 2008 from web

Crazy Cube Neighbor made more statements about wanting a weapon yesterday. Reported it to management. We will see what happens. I'm nervous. about 7 hours ago from web

Notice that last one? Yeah, it made me nervous too. This was the second time. The first incident was about a month ago, when he said, “I’m going to kill you. I’m going to effing shoot you.” I’m fairly certain he was talking to his computer; but still, you can’t say things like that at work.

Some of it is funny though.

He calls his shrink from work all the time. Is 32 years old and gets into fights with his mom about what kind of salad dressing tastes best. Frequently calls pawns shops to sell items with no value and then is offended when they tell him that.

Did you notice the "Bite this / suck on these" tweet? Well, my friend NES actually SAW the note and took a photo of it. It was too good to pass up and she blogged about it. Well, apparently another coworker saw it and publicly shamed her. NES took the blog down.

While I know it is not my place, to that coworker I say a big fat screw you. I sit by this guy everyday. He is nuts. I see nothing wrong with mocking him for it. It is funny. People talk about him all day. What is the difference if it is in writing? Blogging is a quasi anonymous way to vent these things. There is a whole lot less chance that he would be hurt by this than hearing people whisper 20 feet away.

So again, screw you. People gossip all day long, how is this ANY different? You deal with him 8 hours a day and then we can talk.

Da Bears

The football season has started with a win.

A redemption of sorts, with an Indy butt kicking. 29-13 Bears.

Grace has been initiated into her first full season of Bears football too. The game started long after she went to sleep, but she still wore the team colors during the day.

Note the skirt. This was my attempt to not hear, "What a cute little boy!" all day long.

What Happened to #7?

We went from 6 to 8. What the hell happened to #7?

We're talking about teeth.

Gracie's grin this evening has exposed two new arrivals in her mouth. They are barely though the gums, one on each side of her bottom two teeth. Her display of synchronized teething.

I thought we were pacing ourselves??

On the up side, this round of teething has been much more congenial as she has been sleeping through the night for the last week. Go figure.

Anyway, we welcome the new members of the family as they only will help in my quest to have Grace love all members of the green veggie and bean family. We have already made friends with peas and kidney beans.

How Much Padding Does a Baby Butt Have?

To add to her bag of tricks, Grace is not only making it up over the step from the living room to the kitchen in seconds flat, she stands before doing it.

For the most part she just makes a table top (straight legs & hands on the kitchen floor) to get up the stair.

Last night she was getting fancy with it though.

Our gutsy child was standing straight up with no support for a three count before baby bumping on her butt back down to the ground.

Hey! Stop that!!

Thankfully she only did it a few times before realizing that it is much faster to just table top onto the next level.

Red Foot, Blue Foot

One foot, two foot,
Red foot, blue foot.

This crazy Dr. Seuss rhyme is stuck in my head.

Tonight, Gracie was starting to figure out the one foot, two foot process of walking. With support of course and only for a dozen steps or so, but still...

One foot, two foot,
Red foot, blue foot.

As a parent, you want you kid to figure things out. To grow up. I am realizing though that no matter what milestone we are working on, I'll never really be ready for it.

Sure, I keep saying that I want her to walk by the beginning of November. Sure I keep saying that she needs to work on saying more words than just dada.

But what happens when her favorite word is the dreaded "No?" What happens when she turns and bolts away from me in a crowed place with her new found legs?

I know the answer is you suck it up and deal with it, while trying to cherish the memory of getting to those moments.

One foot, two foot,
Red foot, blue foot.

Stretchy Fabrics Are My Friend

It is amazing how self perception can affect your mood.

My clothes are still in the ruins of vacation. While the majority of them did get cleaned, nothing was hung up. Everything is wrinkly again so it is easier to just rewash than iron. My work clothes had been piled up in the dirty laundry basket for a week sharing their smells with each other too.

Given this, I was down to the dregs of my wardrobe yesterday. This translates to only being left with items in my closet that I have a problem with. Too small, too big, too short, too stretched out, too casual, too ugly (why did I buy this in the first place?).

So I went with the best of the worst. Which was a combo of too big (shirt that makes me look even heavier than I am) and too short (pants that look like I am expecting a flood, especially when worn with socks, which I did, and were frankly borline too small.)

I was miserable all day. I have no idea why other than I felt schlumpey.

The fact that I really did gain 5 pounds while back in Chicago doesn’t help either.

I pulled out one of my favorite, most comfy outfits for today though. Straight out of the wrinkled clean bin, but I don’t care. It fits well and I feel good in it. Plus most of the wrinkles have already fallen out.

The point of all this?

An explanation of the irrational before my apology to Matt.

Sorry I’ve been moody honey. Things are much better today. As we both know, a new wardrobe does wonders for my world.

The Trip

Matt and I both repeatedly say, "We are from Chicago, but Maryland is our home." We mean it. Our family is often incredulous when we say it, like it is some kind of blasphemy. It is the truth though.

THE TRIP REPORT

The flight out:
It was actually fine. We arrived at the airport 1 hour 45 minutes early for the flight. We were past security exactly 15 minutes after arrival.

Hmm… now what? McDonald's of course. A Sausage McMuffin for me and a Fruit & Yogurt Parfait (sans strawberries) for Grace. On the flight she never really cried, and fell asleep 1 hour into it and woke just before landing. My ride was actually waiting for me at the airport. All was well in my world.

The triathlon:
The precursor to the tri was a trip to Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder. Not traditional Chicago fare by any means, but still our favorite.

Matt's mom, whom we haven't heard from since May, attended the event. (The lack of communication was due to her announcement that she would not be attending Grace's Baptism because she sprained her wrist 4 months earlier and it still hurt, therefore she could not endure the air travel.)

The highlight of the lunch was Matt's mom church voice singing and pantomiming the lyrics to the Chicago Bears fight song in the middle of the crowed restaurant, after her announcement that she would like Matt to take her to a game someday. Matt is a stoic individual who was able to maintain a straight face, but I did see at least one case of wine-being-shot-out-the-nose-because-of-stifled-laughter.

Matt finished the triathlon with a time of 3 hours 11 minutes and Jeanine did 3 hours 44 minutes. Matt was upset with his time, Jeanine was happy. I on the other hand, walked about 6 miles with a baby who refused to nap and a woman with a bad knee and glass in her heal. Matt says he is unhappy with how the event was run and will not participate again. I am glad.


Wisconsin:
We drove 8 hours- 4 up and 4 back- listening to Chipmunks CD's. Matt was playing the songs off You Tube tonight. We can't get them out of our heads & Grace baby dances to the most annoying one now.

To all the folks who say global warming is a government conspiracy, I might begin to believe you now. It was 40 degrees every morning up there and never got up past 82. Sure, it's north of Green Bay, but still, it's August!

We drank a lot and never really slept.

Matt is a very light sleeper, so he automatically went to the couch every night. While that means he didn't wake up with every squawk from Grace, even with Ambien he woke several times a night. I am a heavy sleeper and I don't think I ever slept more than 3 hours at a time. I often could only get Grace to sleep by draping her on my chest, with her feet kicking me in crotch and her head against my windpipe. It was lovely.

Despite those complaints, it was great to watch Gracie play with her cousins, Jack & Abby. It is always in those quite childhood moments that I am sad they don't get to spend more time together.


Lemont:
My parent's house is always the same. There is no plan. It drives me nuts.

Friday my mom watched Grace so we could go see The Dark Knight. I was thrilled.

On the way home I called to ask if she needed anything from the store for dinner that night before relatives arrived. She said no.

Five minutes after arriving at the house she announced that her plan was to go up the grocery store to buy bread AFTER company arrived so it would be fresh. I freaked and sent my brother to go
buy the buns and more beer.

Seeing my cousins was great though. My cousin Meg has kids
that are 1 & 2 years old. My cousins Gina & Kat are 17 & 15 years
old. It is always so surreal to see the changes in people when you are apart for extended periods of time.


Flight home:
I realized the night before flying home that I had no ID. Gracie's passport had been sent back with Matt in the car and my driver's license was (and still is) MIA. I had a mini meltdown and called the airline. They said it was OK, that I would just have to go through extra screening, so I should arrive early.

We got to the airport at 6:45 for a 9:25 am flight. (Making my brother 1/2 hour late for work.) Despite the extra screening, we were through security in the same 15 minutes as coming out.

Great.

2 1/2 hours with a kid at the airport. At least Midway is entertaining. We ate, we shopped, we listed to the guy with the thick Chicago accent (a la Blues Brothers) make announcements.

"The Cath-o-lick mass will we held in the Mezz-a-teen la-vel a-tree-um at 9 a.m. The mass la-asts one half of an hour. Thank You."

Then we got an the plane, where Gracie immediately fell asleep and woke to the sound of her daddy's voice greeting us at the baggage claim.

Ahh. We are home.